400 b.c. Hippocrates, also known as the Father of Modern Science, built his first hospital. He had one request: to have his hospital built where watercress grew. Watercress is a very nutritious leafy green, and one of the most eldest leafy greens human beings consume. They contain lots of micronutrients, and grow in water. Hippocrates knew (before we had the technology of today to measure certain nutrients in foods or even what nutrients were) that watercress controlled water balance in the body, in particularly the kidneys and bladder. With his hospital built near these leafy greens, he would have an abundance of watercress and he would be able to deal with infections, which filter through our kidneys and bladder. Watercress would enable Hippocrates to heal his patients with a natural and strong cleansing effect.

Ever wonder where chicken soup for the soul came from? No, not the book. I mean good ol’ home cooked chicken soup for when we’re feeling a little under the weather. Well back in the day, originating in China and the Middle East, came chicken soup. Think about a chicken in his natural state… chickens run and are light on their feet. They have lots of energy and are up-beat with lots of vitality. They aren’t on slow-mo, like a cow for instance. So these people (again, before we knew what nutrients or the scientifically proven nutrition of food was like we do today) knew and felt that if one of their own wasn’t feeling well, lethargic and sick, that if this sick person could take on the characteristics of a chicken, maybe they would heal themselves. So Lo and Behold! these smart and simple people decided to make soup from the chicken, some herbs and fresh veggies and made with love of course. The end result? A yummy bowl of fresh and natural chicken soup, served hot. A sick person (lets say, with a cold) would feel better because they took on the vitality of the chicken.

Yes, maybe it sounds crazy but just think about it. We have so much at our fingertips that can be absolutely fabulous. However, all of these man-made conveniences take away from our natural ability to heal ourselves. Look what’s happening now: Recession, crazy weather, civil wars, more than usual violence and sickness and as for now, it’s only getting worse. Being dependent on outside sources makes a person vulnerable, although at times it is necessary now isn’t one of those times. Our government at any moment could take the crutches right out from under our arms, leaving us to fall.

Wouldn’t you like to use yourself (and your Creator) as your most-used resource in healing yourself? We are in highly uncertain times that may make it very hard to depend on outside sources. Now, when we have the chance, it would be in our best interest to attempt to exercise our intuition to get back in touch with our bodies, as people were hundreds and thousands of years ago were.

So back to the fire walk– to prep us for this adrenaline-induced experience, Mr. Tony Robbins had to place 3,000 people in a very strong state with full intensity. We had to be able to snap our fingers or clench our fists to come OUT of fear and into a state of pure pleasure, joy, happiness… Obviously fear would step in while looking at the 8 feet in front of you of burning coal but what was important was making sure it didn’t get the best of you and stop you from stepping out! Resisting or suppressing fear (or any emotion) only leads to that emotion gaining more fire and more momentum and more power that will ultimately destroy you. The key is to “dance” with your fear (or whichever emotion it is). Not only that, but to keep your mind on the end result. How outstanding and amazing will you feel at the end? What does that feeling look like? Keep THAT feeling + image right there at your finger tips anytime your mind goes into an emotion you aren’t willing to feel or that could possibly ruin an experience. Focusing on your fear while walking across the fire is going to get you burned.

I finally was blessed with an obstacle that allowed me to practice my firewalking skills… except this was a metaphoric firewalk. Stepping onto the “coals” were way out of my comfort zone and doing so would cause extreme sadness and vulnerability which because I absolutely did not ever want to feel that again, was quite hard for me to do. Well, I kept my mind on the end result of what I ultimately wanted and WHY I ultimately wanted this and stepped out onto the coal. The second I got distracted and my mind started getting the best of me, I would immediately change my focus onto something else. I refuse to feel that pain anymore. I choose JOY. My mind is no longer allowed to get the best of me and go in any direction it so pleases, that’s my choice.

For someone with a usually sporadic mind, this was very empowering for me to take back my own power from myself. It’s true when they say “you are your own worst enemy.” However– it’s up to you to take that power back from your enemy (yourself) so you no longer struggle like you did before…

Granted, it’s okay to feel what you feel good or bad… the important part is making sure you keep it under control (at least the negative) and not letting it take control…

How do you react to a complete stranger as they pass by with a straight face, a frowned face, an upset face– do you pay any mind to it? Do you not even notice or maybe you do notice but feel as though it’s completely normal? As if your problems are so much more and shut yourself down from feeling any sort of compassion or empathy.

Now how would you react to a complete stranger walking around with a big smile on his/her face, saying hi to everyone? Like they are crazy? As if no sane person could possibly act like that? In our natural, raw, spirited state this is how we are, you know.

See the difference?

America has come to accept depression, sickness, disease, unhappiness and helplessness as a way of getting by. People are not held accountable, only pitied. But what’s even more sad is that these human beings WANT the pity. They WANT to play the victim role because it’s so much easier than working hard to go after something great in their lives. It takes JUST as much effort to be happy as it does to suffer; the difference is making the decision to change.

How about Obama? I like the guy BUT he promises HOPE. Hope isn’t the best word to motivate a nation to do better– hope is a word for people (in my perspective) who somewhere in themselves want something better, but will rarely take the steps to get there and in the mood the government has set– make us feel as though THEY will do all the work for us promising a better tomorrow, while we stay hopeful and continue down the path of victimizing ourselves, still just hoping.

They don’t teach us to ACT on our passions or to take risk or to be creative. It’s a government where they are so subtly training us to think inside of the box and never step outside into the unknown, God forbid.

If you put yourself into a state of hope and actually feel it– letting your body language play out naturally and instinctively, your shoulders may shrug and your head may go down a little bit. After doing this at Anthony Robbin’s seminar in a room of 4,000 people– most people ended up like this when told to activate a state of hope. So Obama– what are you (or should I say the people behind you) REALLY trying to achieve here?

Genuine abundance and happiness?

How do you promise another human being HOPE?

How about coming into a state of faith– knowing and feeling with every ounce of your body, mind and soul that something greater is to come and you’re not just going to stand around HOPING for this to come, you are going to go out there, take some risks, follow your heart and MAKE these amazing things come to life! Because we ALL have the power to do so.

Open your minds!

I guess “control” was a bigger issue in my life than I had previously thought. I’m always talking about awareness being the first step to any growth but this situation I had just not got the picture yet. So tonight, the perfect person brought out this issue in me. I had an expectation and a story of what my night was going to be and it was completely changed, 100%. Not that I should have been attached to my story to begin with, but you know… me being me, that’s what I did.

So anyways, after all was said and done and I was left feeling worse than before… something clicked in my brain that had not previously done so. I knew that I couldn’t control someone else’s actions as much as I know Christmas falls on December 25th. But I didn’t really understand this concept.

My lesson (and advice to anyone who may be dealing with the same thing)…

First off, I have to come to the agreement with myself that the only thing in this world I can truly control is myself.

Secondly, the second I start creating a story in my head as to how I want something to turn out– DELETE it. Let go of expectations of a situation, they will only lead me to disappointment.

Thirdly, stop trying to control other people. Granted, I may be able to have some sort of influence on others but not control. Become unattached from what you want from another person. Any given person will be and do what they want. Let go of the need for control.

Fourth, bring myself back to the purpose of MY life. When I stay focused on the direction and purpose of my life, I am less concerned about what the people around me are doing. I feel more of a completeness within myself and less of a need to control others into fitting my cookie-cutter image of what I believe things should be.

“Let go and let GOD”

How would you feel knowing you made a difference in someone’s life? I don’t care how closed-hearted or cold someone is– love is our natural state and anyone can be brought to that by feeling needed, loved and accepted by others. Fulfilling one’s life purpose has those feelings written all over it. How would you feel knowing you left behind one hell of an amazing legacy to those traveling the World after you trying to find their way?

So now, the question– What is the purpose of your life?! Why are you here?! I know your purpose was not to sit on your hiney wasting all of your time drinking, smoking, fighting and whatever else wastes away your body, mind and spirit. Maybe a person needed to experience those, however, to experience true gratitude and happiness and from then on– live out his/her life purpose.

So, a quick outline you can use that I learned from Tony Robbin’s workshop– “The purpose of my life is to create an abundant life, to laugh and love everyday and to give back to those less fortunate.” –This is just an example– Make sure you have yourself and you also incorporate others into it. A selfish life is a wasted life. Human’s live off of the love and touch of others. Human nature. We are all connected and to focus a little more on that in a positive way would add so much more happiness to your life. Your mission statement should be something you can live out and add to everyday.

Having written this out– (and don’t put too much thought, let the words flow…) will give you a more solid and clear direction in your life. Immediate vibrance and gratification is brought back to your life. It’s so sad to see “wasted life”– do something about it! CHANGE! You have the power to do this! Keep this in mind: It takes JUST as much effort to live in joy as it does to suffer. The hard part is changing the habit but it is SO possible.

=)

This will be my first ever trip that I take with myself and only myself, to somewhere I’ve never been. I’m pretty excited =)

So anyways, I managed to make my suitcase >50lbs. That was exciting. I also flew threw security; I was anticipating an extra long line but it was pretty quick. I was plotting out my response to airport security if they told me I had to go through the new x-ray machines. Something about a stranger looking at the outlines of my body… yeah, not cool with that. On top of that, what about the man who was arrested after being found guilty for molestation of a minor?! Did I mention this man worked in Orlando International Airport for TSA? Somehow this picture seems a little right of center to me. On top of that, x-raying a stranger is a complete violation of our human, God-given rights… just saying. What gives them the right to take away our rights?! Nothing… in my mind.

My first flight was pretty good– four hours and some change, I read, slept, listened to music on my laptop until it died and ate! While waiting for my second flight in Phoenix on the way to Palm Springs, a man sat across from me talking to his wife. He was first telling her how she shouldn’t be taking on so much and she is overloading herself. He then proceeded to ask her to put “Bella” on the phone. I gave him the benefit of the doubt in thinking maybe that was his daughter… until he started speaking in “human-dog talk.” You know, the high pitched-sweet talk most of us have all done. “Hi Bella, be good for mommy! Who’s a good girl? Who’s a good girl?” Then his wife got back on the phone and he asked “did her little tail wag?” Yup, that gave it away.

So then I got on my flight and it was a little dinky thing with two seats per row per side. So go figure, I get to sit next to a man who took up close to half my seat along with his. No biggie though, he was super nice. I almost met a guy who before I got on my plane, that is also attending the seminar I am. It was a breath of fresh air to meet someone so I’m not totally alone in the seminar…

I got my rental car, which I paid $60 for a $20 rental (Thanks to CA state taxes / airport taxes) and OH! MINOR FEES =) I thought I was of age =\ Apparently… I still have three more years to be completely cut free from age restrictions (well, besides apply for presidency).

I drove to my hotel, in the dark so I didn’t really get to see my surroundings. However, when I woke up this morning and looked out my hotel balcony– this is what I saw:

I’ve never seen mountains in the same picture as palm trees, and although the clarity is not good (Since I took this from my phone) it really is beautiful =) Excited for my day.

Well let’s see… the Truth is ALWAYS there, whether we see/realize it or not, it’s still there. And here’s one of those truth’s that is so very hard to accept because it’s SO much easier to take the easy way out:

As a human being/spirit, we are 200% responsible for EVERYTHING that happens to us. And so you don’t have me misconstrued, this has nothing to do with your religion and what God creates for you. Our bodies, our thoughts, our breath, our voices– all breaks down to ENERGY. And whether subconscious or conscious, what we put into the Universe, comes back to us. Did you know that our brains are basically receptors and they are more powerful than a cellular phone? Well if a cellular phone can connect with someone THOUSANDS and THOUSANDS of miles away, across the World– imagine what your BRAIN is capable of?

When it comes to taking responsibility for everything that happens to you, no matter what– one first must realize that whatever may happen is a direct result of what’s going on in the subconscious mind for the most part. Our greater good always comes first when it comes to what our spirit knows is best for us and what God knows is best for us. So keep this in mind: any situation that happens, there is ALWAYS a higher purpose for it. That may help one realize a little bit that it’s not the other person’s fault.

So, say for instance I’m a person who claims to “hate drama” yet somehow, I’m always caught up in it– right smack dab in the middle of a big ‘ol mess. I always talk about how much I hate drama and how everyone else is SO dramatic. Well first off, the Universe is a mirror for what’s really going on inside so if I’m accusing someone else of it, there’s a good chance I’m just as guilty. Secondly, I’m always blaming other people for being so dramatic and pulling me into the middle of it. Well if those thoughts occupy my mind whether conscious or subconscious it’s a good possibility that I’m going to live out what I most think about (again, conscious OR subconscious). “You are what you think about, most of the time.” –Kevin Trudeau. We are a direct image of what takes up most of our minds. Little do I know, that I am creating and attracting EVERY single dramatic instance. No one else is to blame, I’m just too blind to see what I’m looking at straight in the mirror. But it’s okay, have no worries, the image in the mirror will never change– it will keep on repeating itself until I finally understand what’s truly going on! And that’s the beauty of it

Beware: Your mind is more powerful than you may realize. Getting control of your conscious mind is the first step to controlling what’s going on in that subconscious mind of yours– if you can train your CONSCIOUS mind to think positively, then that will seep into your subconscious mind. Hence, attracting a more positive life =)

So here are a few definitions:
re·spon·si·bil·i·ty
–noun, plural -ties.
1. the state or fact of being responsible.

re·spon·si·ble
–adjective
1. answerable or accountable, as for something within one’s power, control, or management.

Let me dissect the definition of “responsible.” It say’s we are accountable for what’s within our POWER. Okay, I understand– well let me be more specific: everything that we witness, experience, attract, encounter (so on…) IS completely in our power. Don’t blame your neighbor’s dog for trying to jump over the fence while barking at you when you pass by (yeah, stupid dog, right?) Wrong. True, that dog is choosing to bark BUT you ATTRACTED that dog, maybe you are angry inside without even realizing it, and that dog at that instance is a mirror of you. Not so pretty, huh? Instead of doing the “stupid dog,” take RESPONSIBILITY and ask yourself WHY?! What is this situation trying to show me? Play with it a bit. Sometimes it may be silly, but nothing happens for nothing.

Let me say that again… NOTHING happens for NOTHING.

There is a plethora of excuses and easy-way-outs that we use on a daily basis to attempt to take the weight/blame off of ourselves and dump the trash elsewhere (I do them as well, everyday– I’m trying my hardest to become aware of them when I say them because most of the time, we don’t even realize the negative words that come out of our mouths). Maybe you failed at taking the initiative to start a business and you blamed it on your ADHD because you just couldn’t focus? Sorry excuse. Maybe you blamed the blind person for poking your foot with his walking stick for making you angry? Sorry excuse. Maybe you blamed your laziness on not getting up and going to the gym… Sorry excuse!

One more thing… Nobody can make you feel ANYTHING. Feelings are not physical, therefore– nobody can make you feel anything. That is completely YOUR choice. Maybe, a person can make you do something physical by force like forcing your head into a pillow… Someone can make you do that but nobody can make you feel anything. YOU are responsible. Yes YOU are =)

Become AWARE =)

Let’s get started =D

What do you do when someone SQUEEZES you (like an orange)?! Your juice, inevitably comes out (like an orange). By juice I mean your characteristics, personality traits and how you naturally react to situations. And by squeeze, I mean push your buttons or to catch you off guard in any way, whether good or bad. Your FIRST initial reaction more than likely gives away your true colors. For example, if someone is pushing your buttons- how do you react? Well, a normal human being will more than likely show some kind of anger whether it be physical or verbal. Whether it be something little like a person accidentally stepping on your toe on the wrong day or as big as someone cheating on you (this would be the person squeezing you). So what comes out?! Lets just say anger and rage comes out. You are on FIY’A! That Fiy’a (fire) is YOUR juice. It’s YOUR issue. It really has absolutely nothing to do with the person upsetting you, because at the end of the day it’s your juice, not theirs. They can squeeze you, walk away and be 100% unaffected at what just happened. You on the other hand, are left with a sticky mess that you have to clean up after. And by clean up, I don’t mean wiping it up with a dry paper towel… you don’t clean juice up with a dry paper towel, do you? That leaves behind a sticky residue that will attract dirt and eventually grows mold and becomes smelly… you need to use water or Windex to really clean it up, right?

There’s no difference with us human beings. When someone squeezes us, it is 100% OUR responsibility to clean up the mess. Not just wipe it but really clean it up to be sure we don’t leave behind any sticky residue.

So as it may seem “convenient” to blame the other person, that person was no more than a prop to activate a certain issue within yourself. Once again, it has NOTHING to do with that person and 1000% to do with you. Y-O-U.

When we are “squeezed” or “activated” stop pointing fingers at the person or thing who brought out a certain issue and look within. Unfortunate as most may see it (really something fortunate and beautiful), any type of uncomfortable situation is only a growth spurt in disguise. Ask yourself where this issue is coming from and get to the ROOT. When you get to the root of an issue, you will start bearing more beautiful fruit (and juice). So the next time around after you’ve already gotten to the bottom of the issue and lets just say someone cuts you off in traffic (or whatever the issue may be), you are not activated one bit. You realize this time it was nothing personal AT ALL and you continue on with your day, unaffected to what just happened. No spark, no fire– This time, when you were squeezed– your juices were SWEET and easy to clean up, if any clean up at all! Not sour and smelly.

We attract people in our lives who are put there to activate us and to bring out the worst in us, in order to serve us so that we may come to a conscious awareness of any underlying issue, get over it and evolve. Life is about growing, if you are not growing, you’re dying. And to be growing spiritually, is such an amazing and natural thing.

At our pure essence of being, we are love and serenity. It’s important to try and strive for that. Take advantage of a situation when you are upset, angry, sad, jealous… look at it as a good thing. You created this experience in order to GROW. So although it may seem like a bad thing, there’s going to be lots of good coming from it as long as you allow it to =)

I had never really felt what it was like to sacrifice, until having my son. Breaking old habits for this little angel that I had never met… except those habits and my lifestyle was so easy to break because I knew that lifestyle was leading to nowhere. I felt redeemed through having my son, even if I was just 18 years old– fresh out of high school. I had no clue what I was going to do, but it felt right. All of those sacrifices were easy. Sacrificing going out, drinking, smoking, drama, selfishness… all I wanted was to do what I wanted– more often than not, never taking into consideration others feelings. But when he came– it was about HIM, unconditionally loving him from that day until infinity.

My son is now 2 1/2 years old and has been with his father 75% of the time for the past month. He’s with him right now, and will continue to be with him for another 10 days… it’s been 8 days since he went with his dad (in total, I will be away from him for 18 days). Way too long. But it’s about doing what’s best for our children and right now– this is it so that I can get on my feet, once and for all.

Here I was… making excuses not to work because no part of me really wanted to. Scraping by the last 3 months for myself, and depending mostly upon my son’s father to support him. This is my son, MY responsibility. I need to be able to FULLY 100% be able to support my son– without the help of others (although the help is there & accessible– I’m saying I need to be able to support him as if they weren’t).

So now, I finally have this job that I said I wouldn’t get (that is, working for someone else)– having the mentality that I am going to jump from point A to point Z all the while skipping steps B-Y. Not realistic. Life is a process and it is about growing. A beautiful apple tree does not go from a seed to overflowing with apples overnight, it takes time. And time– is what I am appreciating most. I am finally understanding the true value of time, although time is an illusion– it is here to help us.

Not only that, I am finally realizing, as I only THOUGHT I did before, the real feeling of sacrificing because this time, sacrificing means spending this much time away from my son so that I can get my act together. Now I am cramming everything into half the amount of time because time is precious and I do NOT want to spend one more minute than I have to away from my son. I rarely feel such motivation, but right now it’s pumping through my veins to get this done and over with and everything on track.

My heart is absolutely broken right now and for the past week I have been trying to keep myself busy so that I didn't have to sit still with myself– feeling the feelings of sadness, longing for him to be close to me and getting real with myself about not stepping up like I should have a long time ago. I feel like my heart is outside of me– 250 miles away. Although it could be worse, it could also be better and that's what I’m aiming for (and no, I will not miss).

Being a young, single mother isn’t easy– but it is doable. I created this, this is MY responsibility, this is my life =) And I wouldn’t have it any other way.

It’s time.

(Mommy loves you, Hayden <3)

I’ve always been a very sensitive person, I would always take things personally, my feelings would get hurt easily– yeah that wasn’t working out too well. Then I watched a short video online, that was talking about the way we handle certain things in our lives on behalf of others. So, for instance, to gain a little clarity (because I know my thoughts can be all over sometimes)– hypothetical situation… I accidentally cut someone off, I guess my measurements of the free space I have to move into the next lane fell a bit short. So the person behind me starts beeping and honking. But not just little quick “beep-beep’s,” they are like full on-heavyweight-fell asleep on the horn and isn’t laying off beeps– This person tries to get over and gives me a nasty look, proceeding to cut me off, then slam on their breaks in front of me. This scenario (or something like it) happens all too often. So, I could get pissed off back and offended and take it personally and add some fuel to the fire by cutting him off again or say to myself “ehhh, this guy probably had a really bad day at work… maybe he even got fired! I’m going to lay off the gas pedal until he gets far enough ahead.” This guy doesn’t know you… he’s never seen you before… he’ll never see you again so PLEASE someone tell me how in the WORLD could this scenario be taken personally?! IT CAN’T! Simple as an apple.

Now, lets look at this from the perspective of the guy in the car who got cut off– “OMG, DID THIS MOTHER EFFFFER REALLY JUST CUT ME OFF?! AHHHHHHASDFKLJSDFKJ.” I didn’t intentionally mean to cut him off and that my friend, is the difference. He could have said to himself “Ehh, she probably wasn’t paying attention… no need to get upset.” See the difference?!

People say things to us everyday that we may not necessarily like. But, before you come to a conclusion as to what that person REALLY meant to imply– think about it. Think about it and come up with different possibilities of meanings for that statement. You will be amazed at how good you will feel NOT assuming the worst. Because let me tell you something– most of the time, it’s not meant to be assumed in the worst way! We are just SO used to doing it that we don’t even realize it and in the end, we grow resentful towards a person who said something that was NOT by any means meant to be taken personal. We grow angry with this person, so on and so forth. Do not judge them for what they say or do! Take a step back, if they lash out at you– maybe they are just having a bad day, whether it was you or the next person– it is not personal!

NOTHING in this life is personal!